"A Sarcastic Look at Nymphos and Douchebags" (or, in non-obscene terms, My Feelings Toward Sluts and their Male Companions)

- written during Statistics class; by moi

It's quite fascinating, yet disgusting, to watch two flirts fawn all over each other in the middle of the classroom. Literally, in the middle.


Anytime of the day, you'd see them mashed together like mashed potatoes. Or better yet, like Super Glue. Or Mighty Bond. Or Elmer's Glue. Or sticky maple syrup. Or...You get the idea.


It's also pretty hilarious hearing them exchange over-the-top false compliments to each other like sane people trade money for things.


Like I said before, they're disgusting. Icky. Gross. Nauseating. Sickening. Yes, those are the words to describe them.


The girl's playing hard to get, while the boy likes to play "catch". If ya know what I mean. Just now (at the time), I witnessed a HUMONGOUS display of nausea right in front of my eyes. So bulimic, but true. "Bulimic"'s new meaning is "nauseating", by the way.


I like to think of them as my very own "entertainment" inside the classroom. They're like those pathetic people on reality dating shows like Fifth Wheel. People who exhibit their eroticism in front of millions of people who like to "get it on".


If I knew what would happen in the future, I could tell you that this nympho and douchebag will be professional prostitutes. And they'll f*** each other until they DIE.


Hah. Nympho and Douchebag certainly can't get enough of each other's carnal treasures hidden under innocent fabrics of unknown purity. Read those words and you'll die of hilarity. Can you believe that I successfully put the words, "nympho", "douchebag", and "innocent" into one sentence?! Am I a fucking genius or what!!?